Life's Morsels: Dark Natural Blonde #????

Life's Morsels: Dark Natural Blonde #????:      Shades of red, green, yellow, blue, brown, whatever.  Somewhere over the rainbow, my natural hair color is mocking me, laughing at my e...

Dark Natural Blonde #????

     Shades of red, green, yellow, blue, brown, whatever.  Somewhere over the rainbow, my natural hair color is mocking me, laughing at my expense!  Home hair color, I use it and every time I do, I question my sanity.  Not really sure what my "natural" color is anymore, except maybe for the white "stripes" on each side of my face.  I got them naturally, handed down from generation to generation.  One would think that I would be used to it by now.

     I turned 60 last year.  Milestone, right!  Ahh, yes, retirement is on the horizon.  Travel, sleeping late (right, more like barely sleeping), flexible schedule, cooking, sewing, fun projects, and so on.  In all honesty, there are days that I don't really think I'm aging gracefully.  No, let's rephrase that.  There are days that I KNOW that I'm not aging gracefully.  Sometimes, it's hard to find the fun stuff when you start the day off with a horror show!

    60 used to seem old, but you know, it's not really that bad.  I make light of the issues and complain, but it's okay.  But, those white stripes, yeah, well they invited some friends to the party and it seems like they all showed up at the same time.  Doesn't seem hardly fair.

    The party guests, where should I begin?  For starters, let's add thinning hair to that list!  When you look in the mirror and you can't tell where your face stops and your hair line starts, that's a pretty good sign that what's growing on top of your head is losing the battle.  Its ranks are thinning!  Behind those baby fine strands of hair that don't remember what color they  really are, there's a chrome dome just waiting to make its debut!  I don't think I'm quite ready to load in a case of carnuba wax and and apply and polish the top of my head.  Really don't want to take delight in knowing that water will bead up on my head.  Wig, no.  Let's not go there.  No, not yet!  My every 6 week color ritual has begun and all with the preferred outcome that my complexion and hair color won't match when I'm done.  By golly, I want to see that hair line, even if it's desperately thin.  Yes, I really would at least like to be able to see what's up there.  So, $2.00 off coupon in hand, I journeyed to my local grocery and planted myself in front of the vast supply of home hair color.  Done it many times before.  I've always leaned towards those lighter shades, if for no other reason than to help blend in that defying gray.  Not this time!  I pulled 4 or 5 colors from the shelf and put them side by side.  I know the other people going up and down the aisle may have thought me to be crazy, but my mission pressed on.  If I look like I'm in serious study over the boxes all lined up in front of me, maybe they won't know that I can't really see them.  Maybe it will be just my secret that I'm only looking at the pictures because the words are in mouse type and that's a wicked bad thing when you're far sighted!

     They make those boxes so attractive.  You can look like this if you buy this product.  Of course, they conveniently left off certain details like being 20 years younger, 50 pounds lighter and have a professional hair care staff of 15 at your beckoned call.  They are so devious.  On the side panels of each of the boxes, there's a chart showing someone else's perfect, split end free, beautiful silky hair, and it consists of a range of 3 colors.  You know, a range of what the final "glow" could be of my not perfect, full of split ends, thin, limp and lifeless hair if my "natural", well in this case, let's call it "existing" hair color was a particular shade.  There was method to my madness.  You see, my thought here, is that if I take it darker a step at a time, it will be more "natural".  Who did I think I was kidding, except of course myself!  Only my hair dresser knows for sure, right!  So, last September, the color choice was light golden blonde.  Then, November, just plain golden, January, well, let's try medium natural blonde.  Today, today is different!  Using that old gradual change thought process, I finally settled on the dark natural blonde and according to that microscopic picture on the side of the stupid box, it should still look blonde, right?  Just a tiny tad darker.  No more white stripes.  No more skin tone matching the hair color.  Victory is mine!  Or not.  More on this later, but I think you already know the outcome.

     Somewhere along the path of life, much wiser "older" people already well along the way of this journey, collectively, shared an epiphany.  Growing old is not for sissies!  Ya think!  As kids, we tend to think we are indestructible.  Morning and night, no real difference there, live your life.  Chance fate.  Fall off a horse, crack your head.  Race down hill on a home made skateboard.  So what if there's a stone wall at the bottom of the hill.  Baseball trophies and paper thin plywood make great bike ramps, right!  Right!  Glowing rings of fire on windy days are awesome for your eyebrows and eyelashes.  Sure!  Wear a bathing suit while ironing that cute little sundress.  Knock a hot iron off and have it leave a lovely 2nd degree burn iron imprint on your leg.  That dog won't bite.  He likes me!  Uh-huh!  These and thousands of more scenarios played out from those days of "growing up", are now a source of aches, pains and regrets, and the knowledge and realization that we weren't as smart as we thought we were.  Oh, and, big duh, here.  We aren't indestructible either.    

     Achy knees, bunions, sore backs, arthritis everywhere, thinning hair - just a few of the delights of the average older adult.  The list is endless.

     If you've made it to this new age and your arms are the right length for reading a book, or playing the piano, OR, reading the consumer information on the side of a box of hair color, then my friend, you are lucky!

     If you've made it this far or further, and you don't need glasses or contacts, or denture cleaner or hot rub for the catch in your hip or knee, then you should play the lottery because your chances of winning might be pretty good.

     If you've made it this far and you don't have to write things down so you don't forget everything, well, you're just showing off.  More power to you!  I'm sorry, what were we talking about?  Oh, yeah, I remember.

     Dear friends, let's not even talk about wrinkles!  Where do they come from?  One minute, you have this beautiful, flawless skin, a healthy glow, and then you wake up one morning and put your glasses on.  OMG!  The Grand Canyon has taken over your face.  You'll be lucky if you don't scare yourself half to death when you look in the mirror.  Furthermore, gravity is thumbing its nose at you!  But, if you don't put your glasses on, you'll never know.

    In spite of turkey necks, facial caverns (wrinkles), disappearing "bum", brown spots, flushing, batwing arms, hot flashes, clothes that hang accompanied by sagging everything else, life is good.  It is really good.  God has blessed me in more ways than I count, and here lately, He's made sure that my sense of humor and the ability to laugh at myself, get a daily workout.

     I am married to a wonderful man for almost 40 years.  He tells me daily just how much he loves me.  Not a day goes by that he doesn't tell me I'm beautiful, and that's even more special on those days that I started off the day by scaring myself when I looked in the mirror.

     Dark natural blonde # whatever, well, maybe you shouldn't believe everything that you see.  I'm a temporary brunette now.  Didn't see that one coming, and the color of my hair right now, well, let's just say it is no where near any of those  colors on the side of that stupid box!  Guess where I'm going with all of this is getting back to the simple things.  Life is short, it's full of earthly imperfection.  It's full of change, regret, poor judgment, sadness, joy, brilliance, incredible knowledge and abilities, beauty, ugliness, good things and bad, wants, needs, being thin or fat, weak eyes, stubbed toes and dark natural blonde #????.   Those are all a part of living, and each of us has our own custom list.  But there's another list, and it's one that we don't control.  It's a sunrise, it's taking a breath, it's a bright moon and a starry night, it's the wonderful smell of a rose, it's new life, it's the end of life and it's all that's in between.  Just a few of the wonderful things that God has made for each of us, to experience, to share, to love, to cherish, to be grateful for.  

     Dark natural blonde #???, guess it doesn't really matter, because I know it's temporary.  Somewhere, masked under my new brown hair, are 2 white stripes waiting to make their appearance.  So, maybe instead of dreaming about the outcome, well, maybe I should just get new glasses.

     God bless...enjoy life's morsels.

     K