Sunday, July 18, 2010

Tippy Toe Moments

The story goes something like this.  Boy saves girl and girl's shoe.  Girl falls for boy.  Boy falls for girl.  Girl finds out boy is a two-timing snake and girl threatens to use a machete and a pair of pliers on boy's sensitive areas.  Girl forgives boy, life goes on and after much turmoil and interference, boy and girl fall in love and end up together at the end of the movie, while boy's ex-fiance goes to Tahiti without him on their non-honeymoon.  Yada, yada, yada.  Thank you Hollywood!

Every movie has a memorable quote and so does this one, "I wanna dance.......with you."  Insert a loooonnnnngggggg pause between dance and with you and will have the tone right.  I have heard my daughter mimic this line dozens of times and always with the thought that it was just extraordinarily corny beyond all belief.   I, however, am a hopeless romantic and tend to believe that if if I was a young woman and a Matthew McConaughey type walked up to me in a lantern lit park in which I was totally surrounded by amorous couples, watching an incredibly romantic old black and white movie, that I would just absolutely melt.  But, then the writers are smart cookies!  They knew that from the gitgo.  The play us and they do it very, very well!

Yes, I agree with my daughter, it's terribly corny, but it is also so romantic.  In the right setting with the right "costar" those five words could easily get any young woman up on her tiptoes reaching to put her arms around the shoulders of her handsome leading man, you know, the one that just cast that romantic spell on her.  There she would stand with a sweet but stupid grin on her face, in anticipation of a gentle kiss and then being literally swept off her feet and dancing in the arms of a man that she wanted to love and he in return.   I think we all probably have A MOMENT like that one, somewhere in our memories.  Maybe some of us are still experiencing them from time to time.  When those tippy toe moments happen, you want to go running through a field of wild flowers in slow motion, a lacy wide-brimmed hat in one hand with ribbons trailing behind, and the other hand reaching out to the one that is getting ready to accept you into his embrace.  Oh dear, kind of also reminds me of that scene in The Muppet Movie when Miss Piggy and Kermit the Frog are doing exactly that.  Oh, and don't forget the scene in the row boat with the perfectly filtered sunlight making sparkles on the pond's surface.  Oy, I'm a hopeless romantic, no matter how you look at it.

The fact is that romance and tippy toe moments are only a small part of loving someone.  There is so much more to a lifetime of happiness than just those tippy toe moments that we experience when we are falling in love.  One thing that so many people don't realize when they do get married, is that marriage is a commitment in every way, shape and form.  It is a job and you have to work at it constantly.  They didn't come up with those vows for no reason.  When the going gets tough, sometimes the parties go separate ways and haggle over kids, pets, bedspreads and electronics.  It's not a pretty sight.  I get so frustrated when "fresh" couples throw in the towel.  Did they think it was always going to be fun and romantic?  

Don't get me wrong, there are marriages that need to end because of mistrust and doubt, abuse in every form imaginable, and stepping beyond the realms of fidelity.  I know of a few of those right now.  It is so sad.

I, however, am not in one of those marriages.  I am proud to say that I have been with the same wonderful man for over 35 years.  Let it never be said that they were all perfect, because they weren't.  We struggled many, many times, but the point is, that we fought for what we had and we are still here, with each other, two grown children, retirement on the horizon and things that we still want to do - together!  We discovered the special tippy toe moments all through our marriage, and they weren't always about us.  Sometimes, they were in watching our children grow, succeed and challenge life.  Sometimes, they were for our own conquests in jobs or accomplishments.  

There are very few marriages that are blessed with perfection.  Most are riddled with financial woes, job issues, arguments over who's right when it comes to the kids, friends, lack of motivation and dozens and dozens of other reasons.  Some people look at any challenge as a means to an end, and do just that, they end the marriage.

So, whether you're engaged, newly married, an older couple or one that is looking to start over with new faces, remember this.

A wedding lasts but a few short hours, the marriage is something that you build day by day by day, year by year, lifetime by lifetime.  It takes work, it takes compromise, it takes patience and understanding, it takes an unconditional love and it takes commitment.  Because, there are money woes, illness, good times and bad ones, problems with the kids, issues with the in-laws, friendships that interfere, and more.  The list of good and bad is endless.

In my little corner of the world, it is less than perfect, but we make the best of every day.  After a long day, we're all at home, dinner is cooking, and then I have the satisfaction of knowing that it was enjoyed by my family.  My treat is being able to comfortably sit back and smile at my little world.  Everyone functions in it and is part of the team that makes it all come together.  At the moment, my husband and son are cleaning up the kitchen!  The food is put away, the dishes are clean and all is good with the world - at least within the confines of my brick ranch.  As I take a moment to relax and breathe a little, I sit back, smile and remember the good stuff and occasionally the not so good stuff.  These times become my own private tippy toe memories.  I consider myself very, very blessed that I am married to this phenomenal man, that I have two incredible children that amaze me every day, a wonderful son-in-law, and a happy, blessed life.

I look at my parents, and I admire them so much.  They have been together for over 58 years, and I marvel at how much closer they seem to get as they get older.  The saying that love grows is so true.  I watch my mom and dad together now, and they cherish every moment that they have, which has to be hard some days, because of my dad's health.  But, the look in their eyes is one to cherish.  It is of memories, caring, love, patience, devotion and a bond that is just unspoken and absolutely priceless.  It's beautiful.  Those are their tippy toe moments and memories that will last a lifetime.

At my house, I don't ever have to worry about my husband coming up to me and saying "I wanna dance, with you" because he doesn't dance at all and this little moment probably won't ever happen, but that's okay.  I don't love him any less because he is not a Fred Astaire.  To put it simply, I love this man more and more every day and I am so thankful for our  life, good times and bad.  I look forward to making even more memories and growing old together.  It's been a good day, and tomorrow, there is another one for us to capture and make memorable.  

Now it's time for you to do the same.  So, get out that there and make your own Tippy Toe moment!  Tell that one special person in your life and let them know that "I wanna dance...with you"!

Be blessed and make sure you count them every day!

Love y'all

just a few more and enjoy!

1 Corinthians 13

1If I speak in the tongues[a] of men and of angels, but have not love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal.
2If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but have not love, I am nothing.
If I give all I possess to the poor and surrender my body to the flames,[b] but have not love, I gain nothing.
4Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud.
5It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs.
6Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth.
7It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.
8Love never fails. But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away. 9For we know in part and we prophesy in part,
10but when perfection comes, the imperfect disappears.
11When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put childish ways behind me.
12Now we see but a poor reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known.
13And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love.